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Peter DeWitt's

Finding Common Ground

A former K-5 public school principal turned author, presenter, and leadership coach, Peter DeWitt provides insights and advice for education leaders. Former superintendent Michael Nelson is a frequent contributor. Read more from this blog.

School & District Management Opinion

5 Education 91直播 Lessons From Chef Ina Garten

Tips for building trust and connection
By Michael Nelson & Peter DeWitt 鈥 December 02, 2024 4 min read
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Both of us love to cook. OK, I (Peter) enjoy it, but Michael is a gourmet who puts a lot of thought and love into his meals. In fact, it鈥檚 one of his love languages.

Ina Garten, who Michael considers a dear friend yet has never met, is one of his favorite cookbook authors. Just a few weeks ago, she released her memoir, Be Ready When the Luck Happens, and he ordered his copy. Her story is remarkable, but her chapter entitled, 鈥1,000 Baguettes and the Business End of a Gun鈥 is when we realized she had embedded five leadership lessons in the book for education administrators.

Ina Garten 91直播 Lesson One

鈥淥ne thing I learned, and continue to learn every day, is that the food we enjoy most connects to our deepest memories of when we felt happy, comfortable, nurtured. It could be something from childhood or a taste that somehow made us feel good, even if we didn鈥檛 know why.鈥 (Page 148)

When Michael became a principal, he began cooking for his staff members. He saw remarkable things occur when they began to break bread together. Research shows breaking bread can foster trust and camaraderie,, and make people. We certainly experienced that when we were both principals sharing meals with our staff. Sharing a meal does connect people to each other.

Ina Garten 91直播 Lesson Two

鈥淎nna taught me to stock the shelves and then remove one item so it鈥檚 not perfect. That way, customers don鈥檛 subliminally feel that they鈥檙e ruining the display by taking something off of the shelf. I wanted the store to say, 鈥淧lease touch!鈥 and 鈥淧lease taste!鈥 Basically, I wanted everyone to feel right at home.鈥 (Page 149)

As former school leaders (and Michael was a superintendent), we both found that many of the parents we served were not comfortable in our schools and, in particular, in our office. Whether it be asking parents to call us by our first name, sending out short video clips before open houses and PTA meetings to give parents ideas of what they would see when they visited, or just making sure we were constantly visible at events where we could engage with families, we acted in ways to help parents feel at home when they came to school.

Ina Garten 91直播 Lesson Three

鈥淚 thought about every part of an interaction with customers. For example, we greeted them by name, if we knew them, and if we didn鈥檛, we鈥檇 find out and remember it for next time. (Page 148)

When we both took new leadership positions in a school or district, we would ask for staff and classroom photos as well as yearbooks so we could study our new teams and be ready to call them by their names. More often than not, when we were meeting students and staff for the first time, we could call them by name.

Not only did this show we cared about them as an individual, it also modeled the type of culture we wanted to build at the school. We wanted to know each student by name, but we also wanted to understand their individual learning needs.

Ina Garten 91直播 Lesson Four

鈥淲e never asked, 鈥業s that all?鈥 but rather 鈥榃hat else can I get you?鈥 like we had all the time in the world for them.鈥 (Page 149)

Imagine if all conversations in which we were supporting students, parents, and/or colleagues, we ended by asking, 鈥淲hat else can we do for you?鈥 This simple and powerful question is an honoring leadership move that profoundly models listening in a way that builds understanding.

Physicians have often shared that a patient鈥檚 first question is not always the real question they want to ask. Patients may feel reluctant to ask their physicians questions for several reasons. In broad terms, patients with diminished feelings of self-efficacy and those who view the physician as the 鈥渄ecisionmaker鈥 are hesitant to express their opinions and to ask questions.

, or desire to appear informed.

How might this parallel our leadership work in education? Asking 鈥淲hat else can we do for you?鈥 allows the student, parent, and/or colleague the opportunity to reflect and, for some, have the courage to share the most pressing need.

Ina Garten 91直播 Lesson Five

鈥淎nna taught me that often 鈥榣ess is more鈥 and 鈥榪uality is everything鈥.鈥 (Page 147)

In working with education leaders from Australia to Canada and throughout the United States, we鈥檝e noted a common theme among all, 鈥淲e do not have time to do all the things we want to do.鈥 Some share that their systems have too many initiatives while others share they are spending the majority of their time on management-type duties. One of the leadership moves we take in our work is to help teachers and leaders see where they are spending their time and which parts of their workload they truly have control over. We have often found that teachers and leaders are willing to abandon tasks they feel are being done to them but aren鈥檛 so keen to look at what actions they are taking that have minimal impact (Peter wrote about this in a blog in 2023).

Ina鈥檚 five leadership lessons for running a great retail business is also advice that can easily be transformed into leadership advice for educators. As Ina always says as she completes the demonstration of a recipe, 鈥淗ow easy is that?鈥

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The opinions expressed in Peter DeWitt鈥檚 Finding Common Ground are strictly those of the author(s) and do not reflect the opinions or endorsement of 91直播 in Education, or any of its publications.

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